The Plundering Monkeys of Ha Long Bay

Yes, d*mn monkeys. They're cute until you realize how much of a menace they can be. Jerks. Arriving at Monkey Island, the first thing that the guide told us was that we can see the monkeys hanging out in the trees. That part I heard and retained. As for the second thing, not so much.

The second thing he told us was not  to get too close to them because.. I drifted off at this point. "Man eating monkeys!" I shouted. I walked over to the place they were supposed to be with a Danish girl at my side, and lo and behold, five monkeys were perched in the trees! Trying to snap a few photos of the little guys, I thought it would be a good idea to walk just out from under the trees to avoid possibly getting showered with monkey pee. Po (decided that was his name) looked like he needed to go and two seconds later, he did. Luckily, I totally avoided that.


Then in a flash, ZsaZsa (decided that it was a girl), whizzed by close to where I was standing, glanced at me, and before I knew it, snatched both my sun cream and face lotion, one for each hand. Monkey!! The little bugger decided she wanted the face lotion and gave up the sunscreen to another pal. As for what to do with her prize, she thinks it best to try to gnaw through the plastic.

The Culprit, plotting her thievery

The Sidekick

Just as I thought my little scene was over, I walked under the trees, trying to get just beyond them to the pagoda. Obviously, this was a big mistake. One monkey started yelling at me and grabbing at my sarong. Before long, all of them were shouting monkey noises at me. Confused at what I should do, the little thing, only as big as a cat, has a tight grip on my skirt and is not letting go! Locals start to come to my rescue, but they yell at me as well. "I told you not to get close!" Oh... so that was the second part...

My face lotion in the hands of the thief... high up on top of the house.

Despite all this, the surface of my pride is barely scratched as I watch the monkeys claw and chew at my lotions that I would desperately need later in the hot Vietnamese sun. Zsa Zsa eventually gives up on trying to chew through the plastic. Po (I think it was Po? he was a tiny little guy!) chews and chews until he eventually does make it through the plastic! One taste of the lotion, and he throws it on the ground like an angry toddler throwing his old toys to the ground. Thanks, guys. You could have at least pretended like you enjoyed your stolen goods.

The sidekick Po.. with my sun cream... jerk